Friday, July 25, 2008

Still Republican Friendly

Yesterday I took my kids down the street to watch the Ogden Pioneer Days Parade.

I haven't been to a parade for years due to extreme hassle of attending one in the Portland area.

The parade started with alot of military representation. Hill AFB sits just to the south of Ogden and is a huge employer and influence on the whole area.

Also making their presence known, as if it weren't already, was our Lord and Savior's church here on earth. A procession of at least 50 missionaries, elders and sisters, walked down the parade route, clutching their scriptures singing "Onward Ever Onward." The crowd went wild and I got all choked up, encouraging my kids to cheer them on.

The state rep for our congressional district showed up, as did the news team from Channel 5, along with few other local minor celebrities I didn't recognize.

Sitting behind me were a few women decked out in all their Utah-esque glory. Teased and bleached hair, nails, carefully coordinated outfit, you know the type.

One of them was particularly loud, she was shouting out in her best Utah twang, "We're proud of you guys," or curiously, "Thanks for coming to Ogden," revealing Ogden's status as 2nd or even 3rd choice when it comes to Pioneer Day Parades.

Then what did we see coming down the street? A huge Barak Obama in a cowboy hat float.

I encouraged my kids to go wild over that. It was the Weber County Democrats- yes, they exist.

I raised my arms and shouted, "YAY DEMOCRATS!"

One of the Democrats walked over to me and we did the fist bump thing in an awkward, white, way.

The loud woman behind me was strangely quiet, no "We're proud of you guys," no "Thanks for coming to Ogden."

I kept cheering on the Weber County Democrats and I felt alot like myself.

Monday, July 07, 2008

Excuse me, I need to go Laugh now

I'm working in the exciting world of insurance again.
Yes, sitting behind a desk in a sleepy little office, processing payments and quoting new vehicles.
It's not much, but it does qualify as gainful employment.

Sylvia is the sweetest, most non-threatening middle-aged co-worker I've probably ever had. Since she has been working there for 13 years, and I've been working there for 3 days; she gets to control the radio.

The radio tuned is to a country station, and not one of those cool rockabilly stations; it's one of those horrid country-that-is-pop-music-in-all-but-name-only stations.

Today, while concentrating on the fascinating glass claim of a certain Mr. Wilfred Hale, a Toby Keith song came on the radio and I felt sure I was going to run from the room.

Toby Keith writes THE most OUTRAGEOUS lyrics of any mainstream country singer.

This particular song on the radio was familiar to me only because it was the butt of a joke on 'The Daily Show' last week.

Here it is:

"And you'll be sorry that you messed with
The u.s. of a.
’cause we’ll put a boot in your ass
It’s the american way"

Just imagine my face as I heard this sonnet of patriotism emitting from Sylvia's radio and pity me. I almost exploded from the sheer effort of keeping sarcasm, disdain, and scorn locked inside.

(If ever you want to pick your jaw up off the floor, look up the lyrics to "The Taliban Song" by our good friend Mr. Keith).