Tuesday, May 16, 2006

A Mixed Race Baby


Obviously, this is my child.
It's obvious to you because I am posting a picture of him on my blog. In real life however, it's not so obvious that he is my child because he looks nothing like me.
His dad is black and I am white.
Growing up, I only saw black people on TV, and my parents weren't exactly progessive thinkers when it came to race relations.
I never considered race or racism my problem.
Our little cross-cultural family lives in a pretty liberal big city on the west coast. No one has ever commented negatively about our conflicting skin colors, but it's out there.
Sunday afternoon - Mother's Day-we all took a walk down to our local grocery store.
Walking down the street with my very tall dark husband, I noticed people, in the safety of their cars, staring at us.
Staring at us.
Apparently, a black man, a white woman and two little children walking together is still a bit shocking.
How can I prepare my beautiful kids for this world that considers them an oddity? Sure, it's not as bad as it used to be, but I'm their mother, and I worry.

5 Comments:

At 9:59 PM, Blogger city dweller said...

I sooo know what you mean. Dont eee-ven get me started. But I know what it's like to be "looked at" like that. You have to have thick skin to be in an interracial relationship.

 
At 10:09 PM, Blogger city dweller said...

ps. he looks like you in that picture, can you see it?

 
At 9:45 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

You're babies are a couple of the most gorgeous babies ever created!

 
At 10:30 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

The first time I ever hear of Al Sharpton was about six or seven years ago when he did an interview with a reporter for BBCAmerica. He said that racism still exists in America today, it's just more sophisticated than it was fourty years ago. I would add that it's also more subtle than it used to be. Now it's not expressed violently, yet it's definitely expressed in the way that we treat each other. And since it is subtle, we often do things that are offensive without really thinking..like staring at an interracial couple out of the window of our cars as we're driving by. It's still based on ignorance, as it always was. Also, people have this problem of wanting to put each other into neat little boxes--based on our judgements of them. So we see people as men or women or black or white or Lutheran or Catholic, etc, instead of seeing them as people who just happen to be men or women, and so on. Toni Morrison said that if there was only one thing that she could teach her students, it would be to not allow yourself to be a cartoon caricature of yourself. Don't give in to anyone's preconcieved notions of yourself, including your own. Be a full and complete expression of yourself. As we work on this with ourselves, perhaps we could begin to see others the same way...as human beings, and not cartoon caricatures of Catholic women or black men.

 
At 9:17 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

My daughter cannot have children and they are foster parents. They got "the call" about 10 days ago that an adoptable baby was at the hospital and if they wanted him to do some paperwork then start going to the hospital to start bonding with him. His birth mother had a one night stand with a black man and immediately gave up the baby. She never even looked at him according to the nurses. We do not feel there will be any objections from biological mother or fathers side so they should be able to officially adopt him within the year. This is my first grandchild and I already love this baby more than words can express. My problem is I was raised by very prejudice parents. My father whom I have had a very close relationship and love dearly refuses to accept this child and is saying he feels sorry for my son in law because people are going to think she had an affair with a black man. He bases his hatred of black people Biblically. Does anyone have any Biblical knowledge that can help me. I do know that there were two different people that were turned black as a punishment for sin. The Bible even says "a servant of servants you shall be". I'm not changing my mind. This child is precious and I would love him if he were purple, but my relationship with my dad has been destroyed and it's taking me with it. I suffer from severe depression already. I feel I've lost my dad. I need advise

 

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